10 before 10

Since I have only one fan/reader, I think it's unfair of me not to post things more frequently. After all, with just the one audience member, the pressure is really on. Feedback has been "more posts, more often".

So, here's the poop: Ten posts before 10:00AM

1. Sandra Lee's forehead is now completely immobile. There are more preservatives in that woman's face than in a whole TV season's worth of her artificial-extract flavored CoolWhip.

2. Winter has not been feeling well. It's been in bed with a slight fever of about 50 degrees. Well, guess who recovered, put on some clothes, and hauled its sorry, cold ass out of bed and into New England? No snow yet, but I'll keep you posted. As for the temperature, "Mine goes to 11."

3. Apparently, the BosNyWash corridor has too many LuxuryCondos(TM) and now must rent them. Pity the poor wealthy homeless, who are apparently living, where? In the abundance of luxury hotels in these urban environs?

4. A new season of The Real Housewives of Orange County. Yes, they're all the same, fascinating shade of beigey-pinky-rust. Yes, they all have the same bizarre, boob-and-nose-and-botox'd look. Yes, they seem to have many, many misguided values. But, damnit, Jeana Keough and Vicki Gunvalson work their collective asses off. Those women are self-made millionaires who've worked hard for their money. And as for Lauri Waring, at least she seems to show the occasional shred of common sense, and seems very kind. It's my guilty pleasure, yes, but there is some deeper nugget of the interesting to be found.

5. J. had the baby on Monday. It's a girl. Welcome to the world Miss Claire. I hope we leave this place in half-decent shape for you and your big brother. I'll do my part and go buy some energy-saving lightbulbs.

6. I miss my friends.

7. Company wants me to laugh. And he let me know that a class is available for such laughter. And that if I laugh more, my stress will be relieved, and my BP might go down. I know this: The email made me laugh. The work I do makes me laugh. But somehow, I suspect it's not the kind of laughter that Company was hoping for. Yes, Company is a silly thing, isn't he? And if you don't think that I should bestow personhood upon Company, then you haven't seen The Corporation.

8. Husband looks good. I'm jealous. I need to join a gym.

9. I admire Dominick Dunne's writing. He creates a wonderful sense of intimacy without being intrusive. He's honest, but in a gracious way. He also has a wicked sense of humor, and, while he writes about tragic, and often gruesome events, he never loses his compassion. He must live forever!

10. I dreamed of St. Barth's last night.

Things I Will Never Do

I am happy in my East Coast cerebrally protective pod of elitism. Yes, yes I am. And I realize that's the flip side of a certain coin. But in my protective pod, here are things I will never, ever do:

1. Go to Las Vegas.
It's everything that's wrong with America, and I have no need to support our ongoing wrongness of bigness, profligate waste, and the continuing insistence that we create cities and habitations where naturally, none should exist.

2. Go on a cruise.
Now, with all due respect to N. who is the on-air voice of a certain cruise line, I just cannot, will not, and flat-out refuse to cruise. See above, Las Vegas, RE: profligate and that pretty much says why, or read Kristoffer Garin's "Devils on the Deep Blue Sea".

3. Go to the Disneys.
See all of the above.

Post-holiday Post

Ooh, post holiday bloggy goodness. How nice.
And a new year.
And another month of writing "06" on everything and then having to cross it out.

Well, the vacation was nice, and so were the holidays. So, I suppose that helps. And there's a dinner party on Saturday! Yes, I can delay the onset of January for one more weekend. Thank you Miss Q for having a soiree.

And now for something completely different: Three reasons that should be valid for calling in sick to work:
1. My bra doesn't fit right and I can't concentrate.
2. I forgot to iron.
3. I don't like any of my shoes.

And now, three good things for the start of 2007:
1. The iPod seems to be working.
2. I got new slippers for Christmas! Warm feet just in time for New England to embrace global warming!
3. Hope. (Okay, okay, cheesy, but necessary.)